'My testicle was so big, you could play it like a bongo'

'My testicle was so big, you could play it like a bongo':

Michael Patrick’s youth was blighted by a bizarre testicular condition and the death of his father. They provided the perfect material for his moving and wincingly funny one-man show

When Michael Patrick finally told his mum, at the age of 17, the problem had swollen to the size of an avocado. Teenage boys may be used to talking bollocks among themselves, but there was one bollock, his terrifyingly tumescent left one, that had haunted Patrick for three years and he hadn’t spoken to anyone about it.

“It was massive,” he remembers, 10 years later. “I used to work in a cafe, standing on my feet for eight hours, and it would just drag and drag. The weight of it was so painful.”

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